First love, the sequel.


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First love is torturous.  When it is also true love and presents itself at a very unfair age, it is a romance that will be tested… Who could possibly imagine that at seventeen, eighteen the high school boyfriend, the first love is the love? A love so strong and true it haunts her, always there in her heart and that place where nothing else will ever reside.

She lives and loves, enjoys fulfilling relationships with other people from various backgrounds who teach her the lessons she was meant to learn. Those loves can not be diminished for they help define the true love that is lost. With each bond extinguished the emptiness of the loss of him multiplies, grows when it should dim.

What if then he is once again there, wherever there may be? So close in proximity his presence is a constant tug on that place in her heart once she glimpses his face again. He is angry, still very angry, and again very angry. He says that she changed him, made him callous, and made him fear. The idea stabs her heart and that place where he still exists as he was, an idea that has been lost.

What if he is still that same boy who wants to free himself from fear and open up the place he says she destroyed? When he looks at her and the eyes, the eyes that haven’t changed the eyes she fell in love with, convey emotions that make that place in the heart tear a bit further, hemorrhage slowly. 

She sees in those eyes the only man she ever met who she would want to be the Daddy. She sees in those eyes, in utter disbelief the man she has never let go. The one she would tell her best girlfriends about late nights, tears streaming down their cheeks, for the friend always believed too.

What if there is no chance he will ever trust her, ever let him get to know her as she is now? Never letting her show him how he loved her, how he taught her to love and because of fear and anger, lock away that place in his heart that only she had been given. Locked in a safe with the combination a faint memory.

All he sees when she looks in his wondrous eyes is the one that caused pain she cannot ever understand. He only wants to turn his back on her, walk away; speed away for it is dangerous to not speed full throttle out of her midst.

What if he goes against all that he thought he knew and lets her in? What if he takes the supreme chance and lets a love he can’t deny still exists, enter his life? What a chance he would be taking. He was once a gambling man but the odds, are hardly worth it?  Or maybe the only risk worth taking?

What if he lets her in and she can put her guard down just long enough to show him how much love she has to offer him? What if they are as they should be perhaps, if things like that happen? Can they happen? Would he take that chance because he is like her and can’t deny that they are the most real he will ever be?

What if he never lets her in and wonders always if maybe she was who she claimed she was, the one that he loves just as she loves him? How will she stop the bleeding of her heart? How will he live knowing that she bleeds for him? With steely resolve? With regret and resentment?

What if they live happily ever after?

Copyright ©2008 Veronica Romm

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Myspace: The honeymoon phase.


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Preface: I was in fact a little addicted to Myspace at the time I wrote this and believed it to be a fantastic creative outlet to share with friends. This explains the title of the article. 

Technology has widened our horizons, broadened our scope and created neighbors that are thousands of miles away. No internet tool or social networking site has been quite as successful as Myspace and at bridging the gap between regular guys and girls and the “celebrities” they covet.


MySpace allows the user through various avenues to find and contact a host of people with similar interests, voyeuristic tendencies and whatever else binds people together. MySpace has even created “celebrities” of its own. For example Tilla Tequila a tiny yet curvaceous user has over a million  billion friends on her site. With a bevy of provocative photos this mini diva has been featured in men’s magazines such as FHM and Maxim. She has been offered promotions and most recently starred in her own bi-sexual reality show on MTV, (season two starts soon). The question then is why this diminutive creature is so appealing to men in cyberspace? For one thing it seems that the interactive element to Myspace actually allows her admirers to feel closer to her. As she adds them as friends there is a feeling that a certain intimacy exists that print magazines cannot offer. Once added asa friend, comments are posted that reinforce the admirers lust for her, with such originals as “your hot” and “sexy” followed by offers of servitude to her every whim. Sometimes these comments are in the form of images and even glittery sayings (lots of glitter on Myspace).


This top social networking site also provides the opportunity to reconnect with people they have lost touch with over time.  They may live on opposite sides of the country or the planet for that matter, but a simple search might prove to find them staring back at you waiting for a friend request or an add. Next thing you know there is a connection once again with someone with whom it may otherwise not have been possible. If nothing else it allows a safe and friendly way to catch up and share news, updates and of course photos that are updated relentlessly.


Musicians and bands find a great deal of support through Myspace. Posting their latest releases, concert dates and impromptu shows get the fans involved and once again bridge the space between the voice on the disc and some more attainable and accessible method of connecting. Once only independent films, but now major studios use MySpace to preview trailers and build buzz for premieres, actors and awards. There are often contests and promotions which offered exclusively to the “friends” again help foster the would-be audiences feelings of greater connectedness, and this certainly does not hurt ticket sales.


There are critics that abound to pledge their disgust and disapproval of Myspace and the many other similar sites that have become popular social media networks since this article was conceived. Mainly negative attention revolves around the problem stemming from under age users posting inappropriate or potentially dangerous material. These critics however disdain any medium that requires responsibility for parents and adults to monitor their children’s on-line behavior. Myspace for instance has a no tolerates abuse policy and responds quickly when abuse is reported. Therefore, the negatives are minimal and are overshadowed by the benefits of connection.


The Internet has been described as a way to isolate from people, and in many ways it certainly does create a private world for some people who only interact via these means. For others, however, social networking sites provide the outlet to connect along the cyber-highway and become much closer to that which interests, excites or encourages them. 

Copyright ©2007  Veronica Romm

Since writing this article I have written more about the dangers that do exist: Our Teens are Running Wild, and navigating dating and internet dating Breaking up is hard to do (on Web 2.0).

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My Proust Questionnaire


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This is the Proust Questionnaire once regarded as a party game where guests would write their answers in a book. Today it is used by Vanity Fair as their final page to ask relevant individuals either featured in the magazine or otherwise to answer. Also there is a version that James Lipton uses in his interviews with movie stars on Inside the Actor’s Studio, on Bravo. I wanted to post it as a way of letting those who are curious get to know me a little better. I would love to have some of my more frequent visitors do it and whether you wish to answer in a comment or in a private email either way feel free to share, or just read and think about your answers.

~What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Losing a loved one

~Where would you like to live?
A beachfront property.

~What is your idea of earthly happiness?
The feeling of intense love and connectedness to another.

~To what faults do you feel most indulgent?
Absent mindedness and escapism

~Who are your favorite heroes of fiction?
Superman

~Who are your favorite characters in history?
Martin Luther King Jr., Sigmund Freud, Albert Einstein,
Catherine the Great, Marilyn Monroe

~Who are your favorite heroines in real life?
Audrey Hepburn, Princess Diana, Golda Meier

~Who are your favorite heroines of fiction?
Not sure will return

~Your favorite painter?
Salvador Dali

~Your favorite musician?
Jimi Hendrix

~The quality you most admire in a man?
Honor

~The quality you most admire in a woman?
confidence

~Your favorite virtue?
Patience

 ~Your favorite occupation?
Doctor

~Your most marked characteristic?
Intelligence

~What do you most value in your friends?
Loyalty

~What is your favorite color?
turquoise blue

~What is your favorite flower?
Sunflower

~Who are your favorite writers?
Dostoevsky, Austen

~Who are your favorite poets?
Wordsworth, Shakespeare, Plath, Dickinson

~Who are your heroes in real life? 
My mother

~What are your favorite names?
Alexandra, Sophia, Max, Jack

~What historical figures do you most despise?
Hitler, Stalin

~What natural gift would you most like to possess?
To Sing

~How would you like to die?
Quickly

~What is your present state of mind?
Pensive

~Favorite swear word?                                                                                                                                                                               
fuck

~What is your motto?
This too shall pass


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Blood promises


Talking the talk
Closing the door
Listening without hearing
Hearing without caring
Parallel lives intersected by blood
Connected by the false
Holding on to the vine
As it bleeds through the soul
Stabbing violently with words not spoken
Thoughts betrayed for lack of promise, false
Promises.

Copyright ©2007 Veronica Romm  

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